In college, I lived in an apartment that was right across from the complex's pool. Lots of pool parties kept me awake, but I was close enough to see when there was no one there, and that's when I would go swimming.
One of those swimming days was cut short because a kayak lesson was beginning in the pool. Instructor and student and two kayaks. In my memory, I'm actually sitting by the pool, watching this lesson, instead of in my apartment. i have a very close view of the lesson that was going on. And this lesson makes me feel very, very nervous to try kayaking.
The lesson was about what to do if your kayak flips over.
Because you are basically snapped into this boat thing up to your hips. So, what happens when the top part of you in under water? Well, there is the technique with your paddle, which will automatically flip you right side up again. It has to do with maybe physice or engineering or something that I can't really understand, and really didn't understand as I was watching it.
That might have been because the student didn't understand either. He would flip over, and that paddle would be sloshing around for as long as he wasn't panicking, then he'd rip off the part keeping him in the kayak, and escape to air, to breathe again.
Twenty, thirty minutes of this. Lots of encouragement, but the student never got it. When he was flipped over, he stayed flipped over.
I am easily flipped over right now. I don't have a paddle, either, or I just can't remember how to use it.
Today, I picked up a prescription that was the wrong one. Back in August, my Endocrinologist gave me tons of samples of Synthroid, and said he sent off a prescription to the pharmacy I use. I have had quite a bit of time lapse because of the amount of samples he gave me... if I was thinking like a proper end-of-the-world-paranoid, I would have kept the samples and just got the prescription. But I didn't. i burned through them, and now have just a few days left before I am out of samples.
So, I called my pharmacy on Friday to fill the prescription.
They never received it.
This infuriated me. Even more, when I called the Endocrinologists office...
Let me give you a tip about Endocrinologists as a rule-- THEY DON'T WANT TO HAVE TO DEAL WITH YOU. Unless you have an appointment, you rarely get to talk to them. Their first line of defense are the receptionists. I have been on the extreme end of them, when I tried to get in to see the Endocrinologists that people still recommend to me to this day. She is supposed to be the best. But... My primary sent over my information to them THREE TIMES. Every time I called, I got a receptionist who said "Who? No, we haven't received anything... let me check... nope. Sorry, but we have to have that information before we can even consider you as a prospective patient..." So, fuck them, and fuck her for having such a staff, deliberate or otherwise.
Then there are the assistants. And I have no real clue how they differ from the receptionists, other than they are sort of the Oracles who actually speak to and interpret the words of the GREAT ONE.
And they are never there, so you have to leave a message.
This is what I did. I left a pointed message about how this prescription should ahve been there, and I need it VERY SOON, and they should call me when it is filled. Only the Assistant's voicemail wanted me to be as specific as possible, and I was, oh, I was. So specific that I made sure I told her what drug the prescription was for.
Cytomel. Also known as Liothyronine(Generic version).
I said the wrong fucking drug, and did not see my error until I got the prescription today, Saturday. So I have to wait until Monday.
Here's what's worse.
A little lesson in Thyroid drugs.
Cytomel is a T3 drug, which is what the chemical, or hormone is like after it is broken down for the body. Basically, it's like speed, because the body can use it right away, and not have to do anything in order to change its chemical structure. It cannot be stored in the body, so when its gone, its gone. It is used in smaller doses, only as a transitional drug, or used as a supplement to the other drug.
The other drug, Synthroid, is a T4 drug. It is stored in the body until it needs to be used. But it needs to be processed into the T3 state so the body can use it. This is the main drug for those of us with thyroid 'issues'.
This Endocrinologist I went to intimated that there was no real practical use for Cytomel. the only use he saw it as was like a security blanket, a Dumbo feather for those of us anxious about the transition.
So, the fact that I got a prescription for Cytomel from them without a peep is infuriating. It just goes to show, yet again, how fucking clueless they are with their patients. They don't give a damn, don't want to look into it, just here you go. Medicine at its fucking best.
Mind you, I made the mistake, and I am still beating the shit out of myself for it. But the whole thing has been ... just ridiculous all around.
It's flipped me over. And I get flipped over so fucking easy these days.
So, what did I do? I sat on the couch, so frustrated, wanting to scream. I had already thrown my phone. Ad ay of relaxing turned into a day of trying to calm down. So I watched TV all day, and ate too much,a nd had caffeine and sugar. All crutch responses to it-- just shove food in your face until you're painfully bloated and drift away on fake funny situations involving impossibly perfect looking people pretending to have problems. Yeah. That'll get me back to upright.
I mean, its worked so well so far, right?
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